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Zippy, My Crazy Little Chimp

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by Anonymous

When I was in Kenya, last Sept 15, 2015, I fell in love with a baby Chimpanzee that was given to me by King Maharani. Because he was a friend of an American that was doing contract work for the government over there; I was surprised the gift bestowed on me. I was escorted by private jet to the United States with Zippy, my wonderful adopted primate. We were wisked away to America the land of the free.

Once I took Zippy to Disney in a backpack. Children forgot about Mickey and followed Zippy and I all over the Magic Kingdom. No animals were allowed, but Zippy got a pass because he was a gift from King Maharani. I try to keep him low key, but the darn little fellow just loves attention. I took him to Fred Meyers, and we shopped in the food section. No one cared because they knew he was going to stay in my backpack.

Once we went to Voo Doo Donuts, and again, no one cared. He passed as a human baby all bundled up, but the noise and wild music got his little feet tapping. I ordered a dozen banana donuts and he went ape shit. We were asked to leave because the donuts went right through the little guy, and the next thing I know he is throwing shitballs. This is why it is not a good idea to take an animal unless of course he is a service animal to the grocery store, ice cream parlor,or anywhere food is served. That is my story, and if you think this is the end of Zippy you are wrong. He is out and about all over this city.

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