Okay, so, we've made it to Friday. The first weekend in a post-President-Elect Trump world. That's a thing now. It's the sort of thing that will cause some people to go out in search of ways to avoid/deal with/forget said reality, if only for a few hours for a few nights, for the sake of giving their head and their heart a little bit of rest. Luckily, there are more than a few ways to secure the catharsis you might be seeking. If you wanna try to laugh it off, a couple of the world's most insightful comedians are coming to town at just the right time, and one of our city's best variety shows says farewell with an all-star collection of comedians to help send it off. If your release needs to be a little more physical and visceral, you have some punk legends, some Philadelphia-based "thrash cosmonauts," and some sweaty acrobatics courtesy our local DOA Wrestling troupe. And if you're looking for reassurance that the human condition isn't as beyond hope as it might seem, Arrival hits theaters to remind us that if we can figure out how to talk to fucking aliens, we should be able to figure out how to communicate with each other and have it mean something. Orrrrryou could gorge on amateur porn and then hit up something called the Sherry Educational Obstacle Course and drink the pain away. There's a lot to do this weekend. Locate your preferred method of momentary escape via the menu below.
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Friday, Nov 11
Dan Savage's HUMP! Film Festival
Here it comes, Portland: Your last chance to see the 2016 edition of our super-fun, super-sexy HUMP! Film Festival! Last week's audiences were blown away by this year's inventive, shocking, sweet, funny, and arousing shorts—and trust us, you don't want to miss it! Oh, and bonus: This weekend's screenings will be hosted by fun-lovin'Mercury Editor-in-Chief Wm. Steven Humphrey, who's delighted to have a chance to (legally) show you porn. ERIK HENRIKSEN
6:30 pm, 9 pm, 11:30 pm, Revolution Hall, $20-25
Fluff and Gravy Records 5th Year Anniversary
Name notwithstanding, Portland label Fluff and Gravy has put out plenty of gravy and very little fluff, and this weekend they’re celebrating five terrific years of great local folk, rock, country, and beyond. The three-day fest includes sets by Hillstomp, Nick Jaina, Oregon Music Hall of Famer Fernando Viciconte, and many others. Saturday night’s headliner is the legendary Richmond Fontaine, perhaps the best alt-country band still standing—plus, it’ll be one of the last chances to see them, like, ever. NED LANNAMANN
Nov 11-13, 9 pm, Dante's & Star Theater, $12-35, click here for locations & performers
Kris Kristofferson
I shouldn’t need to elaborate about why you should go see the outlaw country legend, but I will. He’s in the County Music Hall of Fame and has won a bunch of Grammy Awards. He was a part of the Highwaymen with Johnny Cash, Waylon Jennings, and Willie Nelson. He’s one of the greatest songwriters of all time (ever heard “Me and Bobby McGee?”). And he’s 80 years old and still kicking ass. DOUG BROWN
7:30 pm, Newmark Theatre, $39.50-62.50, all ages
Ora Cogan, Dragging an Ox Through Water, Brumes, DJ Liz Harris
A release party for Cogan's new LP Shadowland, combining her unique songwriting style with psychedelic sounds from a full backing ensemble.
8 pm, Beacon Sound, $8, all ages
Shirts and Skins
Live Wire! Radio veterans Courtenay Hameister and Jason Rouse present a new sketch showcase starring some of the city's best comedy and improv talent, including Leon Anderson, Scott Engdahl, Paul Glazier, Janet Scanlon, and Katie Watkins.
7:30 pm, Siren Theater, $10-15
Fishbone, Larry & His Flask
Fishbone never quite got their due until much later—an oft-misunderstood band that was way ahead of its time. The Los Angeles crew took funk, ska, and punk to new levels in the '80s, touching on political and social issues with a flair for satire. MARK LORE
9 pm, Wonder Ballroom, $18-20
Night Beats, The Mystery Lights
Astute followers of the national garage rock scene might already be familiar with Night Beats. Ever since the Seattle trio took eardrums by storm with 2010's sensational "H-Bomb" single, they've maintained critical momentum with their infectious brand of soul-tinged psych-rock. The highlight of their cavernous blues is Danny Lee Blackwell's reverb-drenched vocals, which cut through bass-heavy trances like a molten branding iron. These pained arguments are underscored with a sharpened guitar attack that screams with such a blackened rattle that you can feel the string coils rub over the fretboard from inside your brain. CHRIS SUTTON
9 pm, Dante's, $10
The Omen
If you learn anything from Richard Donner's The Omen, it should be this: when you're at the hospital, and a priest sees you mourning the loss of your child, and he tries to cut you in on a super-sweet deal for a free replacement baby? You should probably turn him down. Gregory Peck had that chance, and he didn't take it, and next thing you know, he's got to explain to his poor wife that their creepy little anklebiter dressed like the guitarist from AC/DC is actually the son of Satan. That kinda shit will get you put in the doghouse real quick. You also run out of babysitters pretty fast that way.
9:30 pm, Hollywood Theatre, $9
Jim Jeffries
An evening with a man who has become one of the single best stand-ups in the fuckin'world, via a carefully concocted blend of acidity and compassion.
8 pm, Keller Auditorium, $39.50-49.50
Iris Dement
The Paragould, Arkansas-hailing singer-songwriter brings her blend of country and folk to the Aladdin Theater stage
8 pm, Aladdin Theater, $32.50-35
WL, Brysoncone666, Dubais, Vexations
Misty Mary (vocals/bass/keyboards), Stevie Nistor (drums/keyboards), and Michael Yun (guitar/keyboards) joined forces as WL in 2012, and released their debut full-length, Hold, the following year. On Light Years, WL fleshes out all of Hold's best moments, like the subtle intensity of its closing track, “You’re Not Really Here.” The resulting seven tracks are stormy, complicated, and strangely beautiful. CIARA DOLAN
9 pm, The Spare Room, $5
Saturday, Nov 12
Sturgill Simpson, The London Souls
There was a time you could catch singer-songwriter Sturgill Simpson playing intimate gigs in Portland—at the Mercury's annual Chili Jam, for example, or at Mississippi Studios. These days, Simpson's selling out the Crystal and the Keller, but don't despair: His unfuckwithable mix of old-school country, beer-swiggin' honky tonk, and trippy psychedelia plays just as well to big crowds. In other words: If you've got a chance to see this guy live, you take it. ERIK HENRIKSEN
8 pm, Keller Auditorium, $35, all ages
Late Night Action with Alex Falcone
For seven seasons, Late Night Action with Alex Falcone has been providing Portland with the best live comedy chat show in town. Pulling double-duty as a terrific interviewer and standup comedian, Alex—along with his equally hilarious co-host Bri Pruett—has introduced us to the city’s most important movers and shakers, laff-makers, and musicians. Unfortunately, all good things must come to an end with this final Late Night Action show ever—BUT! Rest assured Alex and Bri aren’t going without causing a considerable bang! Expect the last Late Night performance to be comedy-heavy with such terrific guests as David Saffert performing as Liberace, Philip Schallberger (one of the Mercury’s Undisputable Geniuses of Comedy), Steven Wilber (appearing via Skype), Anthony Lopez, Zak Toscani, music from DJ Bobby D, as well as plenty of surprises, and maybe a weepy montage or two? We can only hope! Attend and send Late Night Action off in style! WM. STEVEN HUMPHREY
7 pm, Mississippi Studios, $10-15
Descendents, Bully, Broadway Calls
An evening with the hugely influential Manhattan Beach, California-hailing punk rock band who are currently touring in support of their seventh studio album, Hypercaffium Spazzinate. Read our interview with Milo Aukerman of Descendents.
8 pm, Roseland, $30-45
Mortified: 9th Anniversary Show
Portland storytellers take to the stage to share stories from their adolescence that absolutely shouldn't be shared with anyone because the secondhand awkwardness and embarrassment could be hazardous to your sanity.
7 pm, 10pm, Alberta Rose Theatre, $16-23
Purling Hiss, The Lavender Flu, The Woolen Men
Purling Hiss started out as a solo project from left-of-center guitarist Mike Polizze, but has now evolved into a full-on rock band. With hook-heavy songs characterized by guitars that jangle more than explode, the group continues to smooth out the rough edges of their rock ’n’ roll sound. But there’s a part of me that misses the unhinged, overblown weirdness of tracks like “Midnight Man,” from the band’s 2011 Lounge Lizards EP. There’s still no mistaking Purling Hiss, even on their most recent and accessible record, High Bias, but the trio has definitely settled into the kind of garage rock that’s been losing its thrill in the past decade. Perhaps after another pop record or two, Polizze will get the urge to unleash something with sharper teeth. Until then, live performances might be your only opportunity to get drenched by Purling Hiss’ guitar hysterics. MARK LORE
9 pm, High Water Mark, $10
The Jezabels
Siren Nation Festival brings the Sydney, Australia-based pop rock quartet back across the pond in support of their 2016 full-length, Synthia.
9 pm, Star Theater, $15
DOA Pro Wrestling: Give Till It Hurts
DOA Pro Wrestling is back in action at the Wattles Boys & Girls Club with a DOA Grand Championship event between reigning champion Ethan HD and CJ Edwards. This month's bout doubles as a toy drive, meaning a new unopened toy will grant you special 5-dollar admission to the event. See ticket link for more details.
6 pm, Wattles Boys & Girls Club, $5-15
Vektor, Black Fast, Weresquatch
I regret to inform all metal bands that Philadelphia thrash cosmonauts Vektor have done it again. If you haven’t heard, or just didn’t feel the shockwave when it crashed to Earth as if jettisoned from some otherworldly spacecraft, Vektor released a new full-length this year called Terminal Redux. When Vektor releases a record, it pretty much signals a vast leap forward in all things creative, innovative, or otherwise expansive for the metal genre. Terminal Redux is no different. It’s 10 tracks and over 73 minutes of speeds, rhythms, and time signatures you’ve only had nightmares about trying to play. There are dual guitar harmonies so brutal, strange, dissonant, and beautiful that even with six extra strings and a few extra digits, you’d probably still need a lifetime to figure them out. Oh, did I mention it’s a concept album that also has choral arrangements? Yeah, Vektor has again dwarfed all of your musical efforts and talents. Now it’s time to scrap everything and start over. Sorry. ARIS HUNTER WALES
9 pm, The Raven, $10
Margaret Cho
An evening of stand-up with the unique, outspoken, touching, thoughtful-yet-still-hilarious comedian. It's no wonder Margaret Cho's got a Grammy award for Best Comedy Album, and multiple sold-out world tours under her belt.
9:15 pm, 11:30 pm, Helium Comedy Club, $28
Plucky Maidens Holiday Junk Fest
Over 90 vendors pack the Convention Center with tables full of quality vintage wares, as well as delicious food and drink to nibble as you unearth treasures to the sounds of the Hot Club of Hawthorne.
4 pm, Oregon Convention Center, $7-12
Sunday, Nov 13
Podcasting 101
After becoming an avid listener to fantastic shows like This Is the Read, The Friend Zone, and Jen Kirkman’s I Seem Fun, I myself have even thought about entering the apparently lucrative world of podcasting. If you’re also curious about what it takes, Jeni Wren Stottrup of Gritty Birds podcast and XRAY FM is hosting Podcasting 101: From Vision to Publish. The 90-minute workshop will guide noobs and educate the experienced on the ins and outs of creating a great podcast: from mics and technology to hosting, editing, outreach, and funding. JENNI MOORE
2:30 pm, Kennedy School, free, all ages
Máscaras, Campo-Formio, Prettiest Eyes, Bitch'n
Papi Fimbres, Theo Craig, and Carlos Segovia are longtime veterans of the Know’s abnormally low stage, and their band Máscaras’ last show at its Alberta spot promises to be wild. The trio’s eight-track 2015 debut, Máscara vs. Máscara, is one nebulous glob of psychedelic sounds—guitar riffs bite and bleed together for an effect that’s intoxicating and danceable. Bitch’n opens the bill with freeform, ambling punk that redefines what the genre should sound like. CIARA DOLAN
8 pm, The Know
Sincerity is Gross
James Barela's new stand-up showcase continues with performances from Jason Traeger, Trevor Thorpe, Caitlin Weierhauser, and JoAnn Schinderle.
7 pm, The Slide Inn, free
Arrival
Given that we’re finally (finally, finally) coming to the end of 2016, it’s probably fair to declare Arrival one of the bright points—and greatest movies—of this horrible, awful year. Arrival is an ominous, thrumming, beautiful thing that starts out being about aliens who need a decoder ring. It ends up being about something quite different. Visually and aurally remarkable, Arrival sometimes unfolds like a clever puzzle and other times like a raw-nerve thriller; throughout, with heart and wit, writer Eric Heisserer and director Denis Villeneuve never lose sight of the film’s characters—creatures in a situation that’s weird and mournful, exciting and threatening. ERIK HENRIKSEN
Various Theaters, see Movie Times for showtimes and locations
Skipping Bedtime
Skipping Bedtime is a monthly dance party for parents and other tired people. Dance and drink to your heart's content and still make it home by 10:30pm. This month, DJ Cooky Parker serves up some infections and rare soul music from the late 50's and early 60's to shake your weary tail feather to.
6 pm, Holocene, $8
The Beach Boys
Last month, Brian Wilson hit the Schnitz to celebrate the 50th anniversary of the Beach Boys' masterpiece, Pet Sounds. Now it's Mike Love's turn to celebrate "50 Years of Good Vibrations" with a set that should draw more from the band's early surf-rock material.
7:30 pm, Keller Auditorium, $49-79
Sherry Educational Obstacle Course
It's not really an obstacle course, although watching a bunch of sherry aficionados leaping over giant foam thingys to get to a glass would be fun, but it's more like a nice, calm, guided trip through six varieties of sherry, accompanied by carefully paired foods, and an opportunity for you to create your own pairings as well.
2 pm, Pix/Bar Vivant, $15
Don't forget to check out our Things To Do calendar for even more things to do!